Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
