i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
