you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
