one might say we're banned from that church
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
