If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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