Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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