Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize