All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
