u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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