Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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