is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
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