It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
