Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize
