Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
