called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize