Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
