real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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