The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize