am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
