Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
