After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
