I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
that is very illegal...i love you.
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