I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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