glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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