who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
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