Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
