Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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