i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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