it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
