Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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