i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I need to align my fucking chakras
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize