Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
