Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
