I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
