your room smells of hookers.
And success
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
