I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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