He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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