Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
