Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Apparently you make a good broom.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
