my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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