Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Randomize
