my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
This is my gift to your gina
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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