She said her name was "party"
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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