brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize