Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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