my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize