Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize