I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
