At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Church boner. Awkwardddd
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
