I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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